Dear Mr. Apothecary,
I’ve got a small problem
With a pest in the wall,
Could you help me
With a problem so small?
Bring me some Arsenic,
Some Gold sprinkles, too,
Maybe some Ricin,
That’ll show him,
Spray down some Anthrax,
Now that’d be grim!
Let’s feed him some cyanide,
Laced into the cheese,
Or maybe Copper Chloride
Or manganese, please!
He’d keel over,
Belly up, eyes closed,
How ‘bout some Botulinum?
That’ll kill him!
Why, Mr. Apothecary,
Please rid my house
Of this obnoxious pest,
This God-danged mouse!
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